Have I spoiled my kids by always trying to please them?

Resistance is what exhausts me the most when I’m around my kids. If I purchase tickets to go to the theatre, they NEVER want to go. Going to the beach, a ticket to heaven, ANYTHING… they always prefer to do something else that contradicts my plan.
When my kids were babies, I felt compelled to self sacrifice for them because their survival depended on me, and I took that job very seriously. As they grew older, I never questioned this attitude, and it turned them into unpleasant people to be around.
After 10 years, I finally realized that this resistance was coming from their unfulfilled expectation of being pleased by me all the time! I saw clearly what I had to do to revert this: explicitly and lovingly set my boundaries for what works and doesn’t work for me, and yes, it had to include not only all the adults in my life, but also my own kids.
It was UNCONDITIONAL GIVING what created an unbalance in me and an unrealistic expectation in my kids.



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